The Words We Say

Words.

Oh there are moments in my life I am not proud of.  Weak moments.  Painful reminders that I am recklessly flawed and dangerously imperfect.  And more times than I care to admit, I have been the one who has caused pain... with my words.

Words are more powerful than we give them credit for! We have a choice, daily, to speak life or to speak death to others and even to ourselves!

Do you ever wish you could go back in time and erase some of the words you said to someone else? I sure do!

When I was about 8 years old I remember being at the dinner table with my family. For some reason on this particular night we were in a hurry... all of us were pretty tired and pretty cranky. I remember looking up at my dad and saying to him, "Gosh - you're eating like a pig!" NOT the best thing to say and certainly not my heart. I didn't think he actually RESEMBLED a pig... but it came out as such. I wish I could take that back.

When I was in high school I got mixed up with the wrong crowd for a season. They were bullies and I craved so desperately to belong that I accompanied their bullying of a particular girl who was new to our school that year. She had braces and her family was struggling financially and I remember making fun of her. Over 22 years later even though I can't recall the exact words I said that most likely destroyed her confidence, I am sick with guilt when I consider my actions. It wasn't my heart. It wasn't who I wanted to be. I wish I could take that back.

True story, when Trevor and I were just married I was a very jealous person. Oh, I'm not proud of it, but my insecurities were at an all-time high even in the midst of an overwhelmingly blissful wedding celebration. I remember feeling so confident that Trevor had made a mistake by taking me as his bride... I told him so. I was sure that one day he'd wake up and realize he'd married the wrong woman. That I was never going to be good enough for him and that he should not have wasted his time on me. All of my personal struggles with insignificance came flooding in and I made incredibly irresponsible word choices during what should have been the happiest time of our lives! It wasn't my heart. It's not what I wanted to say. I was so in love but so afraid to give myself completely to the man who'd just made a vow to love me 'till death do us part! I wish I could take that back.

But here's the thing. I can't take those things back. Words once spoken have been released. Forever. I can ask for and be granted forgiveness, but those words will always remain.

Ephesians 4:9 says,  

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear."

And in Proverbs 18:21a the Bible says,  

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue..."

We have a choice to make every day. We can choose to speak life or death. We can choose to love people by building them up and encouraging them. Or we can speak death and destruction to people by tearing them down and discouraging them.

God's Word is pretty clear that we were created to worship the Father. Isaiah 43:7 describes us as,  

"Whom I created for my glory."

We are here for God's glory. Not to make us famous - but to make Him famous. And part of glorifying Him... making Him famous... is choosing and using our words wisely.

James 3:10 puts it this way,

"Out of the same mouth comes praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be."

How can we praise God and curse our neighbor at the same time? We can't. How can we say we honor God and worship Him on Sunday and then come Monday morning we're cursing the driver who pulls out in front of us? We can't.

We can't? We do it all the time. I know I do!

And what about the things we say to others about someone else? Gossiping? What about the things we say about even our own family members to other family members? Like, "Can you believe she did that!" Or, "What was he thinking marrying HER?" These things may be said in private, but they are as equally destructive, don't you think?

I read once that  

"Character is doing what is right when no one else is looking."

Ouch!

So is this just actions... or does this mean words too?

Proverbs 12:18 says,  

"The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing."

We have a choice. To bring healing with our words. To speak life into another life. To uplift. To encourage. To motivate. To bring joy and peace and freedom. Because the words that come from our lips are a mere reflection of our hearts. What is in our hearts... will eventually make it to our lips and out of our mouth. And for some of us - that evokes some fear.

You see - I want to live a life that is most pleasing to the Father.. but in order to do that I must examine my heart so that my motives are in check so that my words will reflect who I am on the inside.

I heard something recently that has stuck with me ever since. Joyce Meyer says this...

"You may be saved, but is your mouth saved?"

Wow!

We have to begin to think how God thinks, talk like God talks, and act like God acts. And it's not easy to do... but it's a conscious choice we need to make every single day if we want to be more like the Father.

Proverbs 13:3 says,

"Careful words make for a careful life; careless talk may ruin everything."

May ruin everything.

Words are pretty powerful!

Romans 12:21 says this,  

"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." 

So the next time someone pulls out in front of you, you can overcome by choosing to speak life instead of death. Chances are pretty darn good that Christ died for him just as much as He died for you and I! And he may never know the choice you're making to speak life and not death, but God will.

Is our mouth saved? Do we sound saved?

Less of me, Father, more of You!

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,